From postmaster@maxwell.lucifer.com Wed Nov 6 09:20:55 1996 Received: from maxwell.lucifer.com ([207.167.210.100]) by mail.nada.kth.se (8.6.10/8.6.10) with ESMTP id JAA18778 for ; Wed, 6 Nov 1996 09:20:49 +0100 Received: (from majordom@localhost) by maxwell.lucifer.com (8.7.5/8.7.3) id AAA31029 for extropians-outgoing; Wed, 6 Nov 1996 00:43:15 -0700 X-Authentication-Warning: maxwell.lucifer.com: majordom set sender to postmaster using -f Date: Tue, 5 Nov 1996 23:42:16 -0800 (PST) From: John K Clark Message-Id: <199611060742.XAA06190@well.com> To: extropians@extropy.org Subject: What am I? Sender: postmaster@extropy.org Precedence: bulk Reply-To: extropians@extropy.org Status: RO X-Status: -----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE----- A few months ago I wrote 3 messages to the list about a little adventure I had. As the question of personal identity and copies has come up again and there are a lot of new members I thought I'd repeat it. =========================================================================== Date: Fri, 9 Feb 1996 I need some advice and it's not the sort of thing I can write to Ann Landers. About a year ago I started building a matter duplicating machine. It could find the position and velocity of every atom in a human being to the limit imposed by Heisenberg's law. It then used this information to construct a copy and it does it all in a fraction of a second and without harming the original in any way. You may be surprised that I was able to build such a complicated machine, but you wouldn't be if you knew how good I am with my hands. The birdhouse I made is simply lovely and I have all the latest tools from Sears. I was a little nervous but I decided to test the machine by duplicating myself. The day before yesterday I walked into the chamber, it filled with smoke (damn those radio shack transformers) there was a flash of light, and then 3 feet to my left was a man who looked exactly like me. It was at that instant that the full realization of the terrible thing I did hit me. I yelled " This is monstrous, there can only be one of me", my copy yelled exactly the same thing. I thought he was trying to mock me, so I reached for my 44 magnum that I always carry with me (I wonder why people think I'm strange) and pointed it at my double. I noted with alarm that the double also had a gun and he was pointed it at me. I shouted "you don't have the guts to pull the trigger, but I do". Again he mimicked my words and did so in perfect synchronization, this made me even more angry and I pulled the trigger, he did too. My gun went off but his gun jammed. I buried him in my back yard. Now that my anger has cooled and I can think more clearly I've had some pangs of conscious about killing a living creature, but that's not what really torments me. How do I know I'm not the copy? I feel exactly the same as before, but would a copy feel different? Actually there is a way to be certain, I have a video tape of the entire experiment. My memory is that the copy first appeared 3 feet to my LEFT, if the tape shows the original walking into the chamber and the copy materializing 3 feet to his RIGHT, then I would know that I am the copy. I'm afraid to look at the tape, should I be? If I found out I was the copy what should I do? I suppose I should morn the death of John Clark, but how can I, I'm not dead. If I am the copy would that mean that I have no real past and my life is meaningless? Is it important, or should I just burn the tape and forget all about it? ========================================================================== Feb 14 1996 A few days after I posted the above the shit really hit the fan. My PPA the Acme Protection Agency found out about it, and I'd love to know which one of you guys squealed to them. Anyway, they were hounding me constantly, following me around and asking all sorts of embarrassing questions. I tried to explain to them that nobody really died because no consciousness was stopped or even interrupted, but they weren't impressed with my arguments. All they were interested in was that there was a dead body and it had John Clark's DNA and John Clark was one of their clients. I picked Acme originally because they were a honest, tough no nonsense organization, but now I wished I had picked a PPA that had a more philosophical bent. The fact that Acme also has capital punishment didn't seem as appealing as it once did either. I knew that if I was going to do something I had to do it quickly. My lawyer told me I should expect to be arrested in the next few days. He said that my best bet was to plead self defense, but he didn't seem very optimistic, and even if I eventually won it would take years and every dime I had in legal bills. I had a better idea, it would solve things in one day and it would only cost half my money, but I would have to do something I'd been dreading first. I looked at the video tape, my worst fears were confirmed, I am the copy, no doubt about it. This sort of threw me for a loop at first, but I gradually got used to the idea, and now realized that I feel just the same so it can't possibly make any difference. I set up my video camera so it covered the entrance to the duplicating chamber but was careful to make sure that this time it couldn't see into the chamber itself. I turned on my duplicating machine and walked into the chamber, a few seconds later I walked out but there was somebody with me, somebody who looked just like me. I sent the tape to Acme and they dropped all charges against me. They had no choice, Acme may be tough but no PPA will prosecute someone if they know there is a 50% probability they are innocent. They have no way of knowing which one of us killed the original John Clark, even we don't know. Well, this solved one problem but it created another one, the copy. I've tried to be broad minded about it, really I have, but the man is just obnoxious. Mr. Know-it-all is always droning on and on about the stupidest things, and he thinks he's SO smart, personally I think he's a moron. Just as I feared he says he deserves half of my money, but I'm the one who made it not him, I remember how I earned every dollar. I don't like the way he looks at my girlfriend either. This entire experience has made me a wiser man. I now understand the value of subtlety, putting a bullet in the brain of the original John Clark was stupid. I also understand that the world is a dangerous place and that dreadful accidents happen every day. How very sad. I'm looking at the jerk right now and he has an insufferable grin on his face. I don't know why he's looking so smug but that's OK, let him grin while he can, it won't last long. I know exactly how to deal with him, and to think, people used to say that I understood machines but not people. I'll soon prove them wrong. It looks like he's also writing a post but I can't quite make out from here what he's saying, probably just a bunch of pretentious nonsense, I'll read it when I come back, right now I've got to drive into town to get some supplies. I'll be mighty happy when summer comes, I do so hate driving on these icy mountain roads. =========================================================================== Feb 18 1996 I had decided that the only way to get Acme Protection Agency off my back was to make a duplicate of myself, that way they couldn't tell which one killed the original John Clark so they couldn't prosecute either one of us. I walked into the chamber expecting to see my double materialize next to me, but nothing happened. Terrified that the machine was malfunctioning I ran to the control panel, one of these days I've got to figure out a way to build a matter duplicating machine without using 89 pounds of enriched plutonium. To my surprise I could not find anything wrong with the machine, then I noticed I wasn't alone. A large tough looking man was staring at me. "What the hell! How did you get in here?" I yelled at him. "Oh, sorry, sorry, didn't mean to offend,ah, are you John Clark" He stammered. For a tough looking guy he was sure acting like a wimp. I never could intimidate big gorillas like this guy, but I guess those assertiveness training tapes I bought on the home shopping network were paying off after all. "Yea I'm Clark and who the fuck are you" I said in the tough man voice the tapes had taught me. Then I noticed it was dark outside, 5 minutes before when I walked into the chamber it was about noon. " What's going on?" I said, not sounding quite so tough. " Oh I'm sorry, my name is Spade, Sam Spade, I'm a private investigator, I work for Acme, but don't worry I'm not here to arrest you or anything. Ten and a half days have passed since you walked into that chamber, and there is nothing wrong with your machine, it's sort of hard to explain but the fact is, I used the machine's maintenance logs to reconstruct you 5 minutes ago, just as you were the last time you used the machine, 10 and a half days ago." For some, finding out they were a copy of a copy would be big news, but for me it was getting to be old hat. What was amazing was that some gum shoe had done it, and from the maintenance log. The information on the state of the machine and thus on every object I ever duplicated is in those computer logs, but the format of the logs would make it difficult to extract because that's not what they were made for. I never used them for anything except troubleshooting the machine. "My congratulations Mr. Spade" I said " it's not every private eye that has a good enough working knowledge of Schrodinger's Wave Equation, quantum coherence and non linear error correcting codes to read those logs correctly". "Yeah well... I got an A in shop class when I was a kid" He said with a touch of pride. "Really! I did too." I said " But what's been going on for the last 10 days?" Spade said "The copy of John Clark did duplicate himself, but apparently the two versions didn't get along". " I've been told I'm a hard man to live with" I said a little sheepishly. "Both Clarks are dead, and they died at almost exactly the same time, it could be accidental, but the deaths are a little suspicious, especially when you consider two almost identical posts made to the to the internet by them that are somewhat incriminating. One Clark was found in his car at the bottom of a thousand foot cliff. The roads were icy, but the brake lines didn't look quite right to me. The other Clark was found crushed under a Coke machine. The consensus is that he put in his 50 cents and when it didn't give him his Coke he started beating on it until the machine tipped over on him and fractured his skull. Well maybe, but that machine was heavy, I tried, I could tip it over and I'm bigger than he was. I think they killed each other, they were similar enough to want to kill each other but diverged enough in 10 days to chose different methods". " Now you can't blame that on me" I said indignity, " I know nothing about it, I didn't even exist then, well not exactly..." "Nobody's blaming you" Spade said soothingly " and you are still one of our clients, so when I mentioned the maintenance logs in my report my boss said we were legally bound to make a good faith effort to revive you, so he told me to give it a try and do my best." He brought out a document from his coat " I am also authorized to offer you this deal, Acme agrees not to prosecute you in any manner for this incident and to seal the case file, there are those who might find it, ah, titillating. In return, you absolve Acme of any liability in this matter and agree to resign from The Acme Protection agency within 5 working days. The unused portion of your premium will of course be refunded." Now you can't beat that deal with a stick, I signed the paper before they could change their mind. I said " I want to thank you Mr. Spade for bringing me back. Can I offer you a drink?" He was already heading for his car at a trot "Thanks but no" He said " I've got this, this important thing I've got to do, It's ah, a thing of importance, I've got to, ah, wash the lawn, I mean mow the dog, I mean... good-bye". I'm afraid our Mr.Spade is a bit of an oddball , I seem to run across more and more people like him lately. As I stood there amid the smell of burning rubber a disturbing thought occurred to me, it was a pretty tricky job to get all the information about me just from the maintenance logs, was I really OK, had Spade gotten everything right? I've always been good at mental arithmetic so I gave myself a test, 5 and 5 is 10, 19 minus 6 is 12, 8 times 9 is 73. Right on the money! That was reassuring. I must be John Clark, I have all of his memories, I remembered a happy day in my childhood when I joined the Vladimer Lenin fan club and received an autographed 8 by 10 glossy of the master that has hung in a place of honor in my bedroom until it disappeared that very day. Spade must of stolen it. I remembered my triumphant election as the head of SHIT (Stop Heretical Independent Thoughts) and how I had always hated the Extropian and Transhuman philosophy. The memory of the time I played Twister in The Kremlin with Marilyn Monroe, J Edgar Hoover and The Dalai Lama while the Pope serenaded us with a lovely rendition of Louie Louie, are as sharp in my mind as the day it happened. Clearly there was nothing wrong with my mind, but what about my body? I looked at myself in a mirror and I don't want to brag or anything but I looked great! My skin was a nice healthy blue, the scales on the tail were strong and sharper than ever. I smiled, what women wouldn't fall for that infectious grin and the handsome green slime that oozed out between my fangs and fell artistically to the floor. John K Clark johnkc@well.com -----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE----- Version: 2.6.i iQCzAgUBMoBId303wfSpid95AQHdGATvf93WIvxbSOK8oZB4nXl827pgXTLjE0Eu ICSbT0f0SUCsXSI+8RWrMNJcI+AhZ16gNgXVlLN+rPWplfHmiBz4VN0LWkkd2VNQ op3DXDFelC/Idyxkv2/rueNreMlbDUXRMZphWw0OTK0soVsYd7o/8JLRz5nhGkkD PcjKxXhZqSwxBDaXtvmXL7dwNNLHlEeLDBI6hKyyKDq+vlAQst8= =Lq9f -----END PGP SIGNATURE-----